naked recourse Artistic research apass 2013-2014 View Research publication View Tara interview When starting an artistic research at apass, what concerned me was the issue of law. With great ambition I titled my research Lawful Acts; with an intent to research legal texts and to create performances to provoke a precedent which could subvert anti-terror legislation. My aim was to find an antonym to terror. After reading an interview of Foucault on the technologies of the self, the focus shifted and an intent to orient my research towards eroticism and its affect on politics arose. I started playing with writing little poems and when the phrase “loves law knows no rule” appeared, most of my previous interest in law and legislation vanished. Naked Recourse, an attempt to research a reappraisal of being before attributing quality or lifestyle categorisation, became the pivotal point in the exploration of a sense of selves. In practice this resulted in making an erogenous zone in space, marked with paper tape on the floor, wherein I would interview visitors whilst having no clothes on. The conversations within this zone were open in duration, with a few phrases that the visitors could randomly choose as a point of departure. The research and practice of Naked Recourse resulted in an overflow of audio material which I attempted to transcribe, resulting in a crisis and a refusal to work with these time consuming post-production processes. Previous experiences as a video designer reminded me to my immanent desire to work within a present tense, closer to my practices as a performance artist and choreographer. After a three months pause from the research program, wherein I took time to develop the activities in our artist run space, the continuation found a more gradual development. The writing of Naked Recourse Diary allowed an insight into the cyclic processes of my aspirations and pitfalls. These writings gave a retrospective on the affects of the lunar cycles, as described in Present Shock by Douglass Rushkoff. From these writings, and other texts concerning social choreography, an apparatus was developed. With the aid of Lili Mihajlovic, we sampled these texts, resulting in single sentences. During a few workshops, the single sentences were used as a point of departure for a performative experience. The experiences were then re-interpreted by applying previously developed articles. Then the experiences were discussed amongst the participants and generated another article, or an annex. The apparatus functioning: 1. selecting a sentence 2. experience in performance 3. transformation through applying previously existing outcomes 4. verbal reflection 5. writing new outcome or adding to an existing outcome. The combination of the apparatus functioning with Naked Recourse's research content and involving participants with no prior experience to the research process, resulted in a rephrasing of the research. Intimate Contingencies became its new working title. At this stage in the research my personal relations, attachments and additive tendencies became problematic to continuing the practice by myself. This caused a turning point into how I thought about what I wanted to be and what I appeared to be doing. Radically confused and at the verge of another identity crisis I decided to let go of most possessions and decided to take more time to care for how dreams and intentions constitute a perception of reality. The months following have been that of a reappraisal of the most simple acts, lovingly reconnecting to flows of desire, allowing anxiety to exist beyond sedation, relating to humour in the importance of language, practicing tantra, doing less. The research in apass has given me - or whoever me denotes - a place for developing the mind with the body, in relation with the many changes that are inviting me to learning by myself and together with the selves which share these ongoing artistic processes. Continuing post-apass with a performance band called Lizzy Aster, realising utopia in da worlds stages, and Tara, white, green, red, yellow, blue, and ultra beyond violet delusion, off course.